Trauma Isn’t Just in the Past: Understanding How It Lives On in the Body and Mind

Many people come to therapy believing that trauma is something that should stay in the past. They may tell themselves,“It happened years ago,”or“I should be over this by now.”For some, this belief is reinforced by others who assume that time alone heals all wounds.

Yet trauma does not follow a simple timeline. For many adults, the impact of trauma continues long after the event itself has ended — not because they are weak or “stuck,” but because trauma is not held only in memory. It is held in thebody, nervous system, and emotional responses.

Understanding this can be deeply relieving. It shifts the question from“What’s wrong with me?”to“What happened to me — and how did I adapt to survive?”

How trauma lives on in the nervous system

When someone experiences threat, the nervous system responds automatically. This is not a conscious choice; it is a survival mechanism. The body shifts into states of fight, flight, freeze, or collapse in order to stay safe.

If the threat is overwhelming, repeated, or occurs during periods of vulnerability — such as childhood or adolescence — these responses can becomeembedded patterns. Even years later, the nervous system may continue to react as though danger is still present.

This can show up as:

• persistent anxiety or panic

• feeling constantly on edge or hyper-alert

• emotional shutdown or numbness

• difficulty trusting others

• strong shame or self-blame

• difficulty feeling safe, even in calm environments

These responses are not signs of failure. They are signs of a nervous system that learned how to survive.

Trauma and neurodivergence

For neurodivergent individuals, including those with ADHD or autism, trauma can be especially complex. Many people grow up feeling different without knowing why, often receiving criticism or misunderstanding rather than support.

Over time, this can lead to masking, chronic self-monitoring, and deep self-criticism. When trauma and neurodivergence intersect, individuals may experience heightened emotional sensitivity, overwhelm, or burnout, particularly later in life.

Receiving a diagnosis in adulthood can be validating, but it can also bring grief — for unmet needs, missed understanding, or years spent believing the problem was personal failure rather than difference.

Therapy can help to gently separate who you are from what you learned to do to cope.